why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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