the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
