Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
