And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize