Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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