I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
