You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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