Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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