I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
