Me. At least after what I've been through.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.