You smell like stripper and shame
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
