Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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