he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
