i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
