the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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