New low: just hacked my moms facebook
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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