i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.