Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
