Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
