The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
