I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
