So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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