im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
i now understand why vodka
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
