I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize