Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize