Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Drunk is not a location!
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize