There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
