Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
This house was built for laser tag.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Im part way to drunk.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
