problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
