i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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