I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
