i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
