What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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