Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize