Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
