You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i love accidental penises.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
