I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Randomize
