no, he came in my armpit
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
