dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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