I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
