my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
