I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
