Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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