I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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