i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
