Swine flu. Run for my life!
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize