my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
