I wanna passion pit in your ass
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
There are leaves in my underwear?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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