Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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