last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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