so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
